Oh. My. Heavens.
I'm officially traumatized people. Today marks the beginning of one of the English/Lanugage Arts state tests - the DWA. Let me tell you, these tests are STRESS CENTRAL. Watching each of my students making small errors - things I would normally stop and address with them personally in class - is killing me.
No, student sitting there with "i" not capitalized, there is no autocorrect! Go back and fix it!
But I can't say these things.
It's like I'm stifling myself. My current inner mantra - Don't say anything that isn't written in the manual. Don't say anything that isn't written in the manual. Don't say anything...
BUT THEY KNOW IT! I KNOW THEY DO! I HAVE MY OWN ASSESSMENTS TO PROVE IT! THEY'RE JUST STRESSED AND SCATTERED RIGHT NOW! LIKE ME!
Don't say anything that isn't written in the manual.... Right?
Being both a 7th and 8th grade English teacher, I'm dying. The 7th grade teachers decided to do their common assessments today and tomorrow as well. So, I'm running with my head trailing three feet behind me because I literally have to be in two places at once. The DWA is not timed, so I had students that started working into the next class period (lucky/unlucky for me that was lunch), but I was technically supposed to be in my classroom so that my next class of students could drop off their iPads in my room before lunch.
Thank you to my blessed neighboring teacher who let them into my room through our secret office doorway. There was no way I could leave students unsupervised while they were still testing while still keeping my job.
Oh and did I mention that we - in the ten minutes before school started - decided to change the text for our 7th grade common assessment test? Yup.
Planning. It might be a department weakness. But, it's all a learning experience, right?
All the while, I'm sitting here in emotional-panic mode. Did I do enough? Did I prep them enough? Did I teach them all the things that really matter for this test? I know I did, but I sit here wondering if it was enough for each of my wonderful students. I want to fight for them so badly, but this is the time when I have to surrender the teacher within and watch them shine. Hopefully. ;) And then I'm thinking, why didn't I prepare more? Why didn't I prepare better?
So, here's my resolution for next year. I will overwhelm my students with models of good writing. Before they begin, I want them to see good models, take notes on those models, analyze those models, and then receive additional explicit instruction about what to put in their writing. All of my students responded so well when I created models for them to look at, but I know I could have done that more. I just know I used to be the kind of student that looked at the models and was paralyzed, so I usually showed good models AFTER my students finished their first drafts because I didn't want them simply copying the model. I know my creativity was gone when I saw the model first as a student. I could only see it being done that way! But, if it's the right way, or the best way, or even a really good way, is that such a bad thing?
So, I'm taking deep breaths and creating models to use for any remediation efforts over the next few weeks...
Easy there, baby teacher. You can't be perfect yet. Just look at the opportunities to improve for tomorrow and for next year.
And then breath some more.
Thursday, February 28, 2013
Friday, February 15, 2013
Oh the Drama...
I LOVE English teachers.
I kind of have to since I AM one.
But I didn't realize how English teachers are oftentimes perceived by other teachers in the school. We're needy. Dramatic. Way too serious for our own good.
Why?
Well - have you seen the Common Core for Language Arts? I mean really? In comparison to the Core for Science? Or Math? Ours is a short novel. Theirs is a page. Or two.
So it's been kind of fun to be a part of/privy to the drama between curriculums.
The counseling center needs to make a presentation to all 8th grade students. They choose to do so during English classes; however, 8th graders have the DWA test in a few weeks, so that decision didn't go over well with 8th grade English teachers.
So now they're doing the presentation in Science classes.
The CRTs (end of level tests) are being scheduled. I put some pressure on the teacher in charge of the testing scheduling to find out when English was going to be doing their CRTs (because I want to make sure I CAN ACTUALLY GO TO MY GRADUATION without worrying about missing the end of level tests for my students). Found out English is going first. Found out this is not the first time they are going first. Also found out that this has been a sensitive point for the department for a LONG time.
And I wonder why some of my students think I take my job or my lessons too seriously. ;)
Speaking of tests, I'm doing some preparation and investigation to make sure that my students are prepared for the format of our end of level tests, as well as for the kinds of questions they are going to be asked. I've gotten a few model tests from other states, but I'm still on the lookout for some good tools. If anyone knows of any, let me know!
I kind of have to since I AM one.
But I didn't realize how English teachers are oftentimes perceived by other teachers in the school. We're needy. Dramatic. Way too serious for our own good.
Why?
Well - have you seen the Common Core for Language Arts? I mean really? In comparison to the Core for Science? Or Math? Ours is a short novel. Theirs is a page. Or two.
So it's been kind of fun to be a part of/privy to the drama between curriculums.
The counseling center needs to make a presentation to all 8th grade students. They choose to do so during English classes; however, 8th graders have the DWA test in a few weeks, so that decision didn't go over well with 8th grade English teachers.
So now they're doing the presentation in Science classes.
The CRTs (end of level tests) are being scheduled. I put some pressure on the teacher in charge of the testing scheduling to find out when English was going to be doing their CRTs (because I want to make sure I CAN ACTUALLY GO TO MY GRADUATION without worrying about missing the end of level tests for my students). Found out English is going first. Found out this is not the first time they are going first. Also found out that this has been a sensitive point for the department for a LONG time.
And I wonder why some of my students think I take my job or my lessons too seriously. ;)
Speaking of tests, I'm doing some preparation and investigation to make sure that my students are prepared for the format of our end of level tests, as well as for the kinds of questions they are going to be asked. I've gotten a few model tests from other states, but I'm still on the lookout for some good tools. If anyone knows of any, let me know!
Thursday, February 14, 2013
Oh how far I've come...
Sorry about the break. I promise, I've been teaching, but it's all been a whirlwind to me.
My darling practicum student has come and taught twice this week and has done such a good job. It was a HUGE learning experience for me. For the first period of her instruction, I watched her stand at the front of her classroom and do her thing (beautifully, of course), but this thing inside of me kept calling out, "Get away from the front of the classroom. They're not paying attention to you! Look out at them! I see 10+ students that are definitely not looking at the handout you sent to them..."
Then, I remembered. The intern I taught some lessons for said almost those exact same words to me after my first lesson in his class.
It felt good to realize that this little baby teacher has done some monumental growing in the last year.
Also, something happened yesterday. A good something. Here's the email I sent out to those people I wanted to tell...
My darling practicum student has come and taught twice this week and has done such a good job. It was a HUGE learning experience for me. For the first period of her instruction, I watched her stand at the front of her classroom and do her thing (beautifully, of course), but this thing inside of me kept calling out, "Get away from the front of the classroom. They're not paying attention to you! Look out at them! I see 10+ students that are definitely not looking at the handout you sent to them..."
Then, I remembered. The intern I taught some lessons for said almost those exact same words to me after my first lesson in his class.
It felt good to realize that this little baby teacher has done some monumental growing in the last year.
Also, something happened yesterday. A good something. Here's the email I sent out to those people I wanted to tell...
After talking to some other teachers at the school and many prayers, I went to see Jarod, the principal at my school, just with the plan of asking about some substitute request forms I had submitted for the upcoming months.
He answered my questions then stated, "Hey, I might have an answer for you about us by next week. Some things have come to my attention, and I may know sooner than I indicated before. I need you, and I'm willing to tell BYU 'No' to another intern to keep you. You'd have to go through the application process of course, but I just wanted to let you know."
Of course my heart was racing, but I seemed to manage a somewhat professional reply by saying, "Jarod, I would submit 100 different applications if it meant I got to be a part of this school. Thanks for keeping me updated."
I just wanted to let each of you know. And I wanted to thank you for the support you have been to me as I've gone through these past few months. It has been a wonderful experience for me to learn and to grow and to grow in my own confidence as a teacher as well.
Extra prayers and crossed fingers!
Believe me, I'll keep you posted either way. :D
Then, today, Jarod came in with the Superintendent of the district to observe my remediation time. My students were all hard at work on their iPads. It was the perfect moment for an observation, and my sigh of relief was probably audible after they left my room. Yay.
I have been so incredibly blessed, and I'm so glad that so much of what I do seems to be second nature:
- Cold call on a student who you anticipate is off task. Yup. Did that today without thinking and saw 5 other students sit up a bit taller in their chairs afterwards to prevent the same fate.
- Walk around the classroom as I'm teaching to ensure I have everyones attention and so that I can monitor student progress WHILE I'm teaching. Not easy, but I've gotten WAY better.
- Set expectations regularly. I'm still, to this day, raising my hand and saying, "Raise your hand..." before I actually ask a question. Do I still have students who don't meet that expectation? Yes. But at least now I know it's not because they didn't know what was expected.
- Do the WE-WE-WE-WE-WE part over and over again before expecting your students to do it successfully on their own.
I'm telling you - I'm learning SO much.
But the DWA test is in less than two weeks and I have SOOOO much more practice to do. So - I'm off!
Friday, February 8, 2013
Will I Ever Learn?
Today was GREAT.
7th - Finished the outsiders - my students are brilliant readers.
8th - Finished the outline of our argumentative essays in response to Downriver. My students are so sharp.
But 4th period - AGAIN - I just couldn't get a handle on today. My 2nd period 8th grade class did GREAT. They finished their outlines without too much of a problem and we went right into our discussion of the purpose of counterarguments. We even had a "Backwards Debate" where we picked topics they thought I would disagree with them on, and then they had to brainstorm what evidence they thought I would use in a debate. Essentially, they were arguing MY side. It was a hoot! So much fun.
But 4th period - AGAIN - it didn't work for them. I've got some smart students who are "with it" who were already done with their outline so they wanted to sleep (even though I had planned differentiated activities and told those students to start pulling direct quotes from the novel to support the evidence they outlined). I've got some lazy students who hardly had anything filled in from our class time yesterday and when I tried to help them, they were all like, "I've got it, I've got it..." but then didn't do the work and decided to goof off on the iPad. I've got students who decided to write stupid things on their outline that they knew weren't true. And I've got students who are just dying to get to the next stage and are frustrated at how slow I'm moving - but that's only because so many students are so far behind.
(This has really got me thinking about the ethics behind honors classes now. I heard some teachers debate, earlier this year, about honors classes - some of them arguing that honors classes are elitist and rob our other classes of differentiated comments and ideas. And I understood where they were coming from - almost agreed - but now, I understand that it's a level-of-understanding thing. I'm dying for my brilliant students to move on because I would be right there with them, biting at the bit to move MY pace. But I have a bunch of students who don't care or who won't work unless I'm standing right behind them that keep us moving slower than I would ever want.)
And then I've got students in that class that do everything possible to make it THEIR class. I thought the "debate Mrs. Brown" thing would be great, but they just turned disrespectful and unreasonable. I actually had a student (who was very passionate about the topic, mind you) refuse to participate when I asked him to (because he was making off-hand remarks to what I was saying every two seconds). He stated, "Why should I say anything now? You're just going to say something stupid." Thank you student for supplying me with perfect evidence about the need to give credit to your opponents argument before moving on with your own, otherwise they don't respect YOUR opinion. Yeah - he didn't appreciate me using him as an example.
It was just bad.
Even the cute girl student who confessed to me yesterday that I was her favorite teacher in the school and that she wanted me to teach 9th grade next year left the class with just a "Bye, Mrs. Brown" and an unsatisfied look on her face.
Will I ever get it right?
Yes. It's Friday and my students have all been pretty tired. Yes. They're eighth graders and maybe this is their signal to me that they already know this stuff and I should just move on. Yes, I'm exasperated because every time I think I'm making headway on reading the needs of these students, they throw a curve ball at me.
I have no idea what to do from here. I really want to go pull some of those disrespectful students from out of their 5th period class and have them sign a behavior contract that lays some ground rules that they agree to follow because I can't have 4-5 male students always trying to one-up me and my lessons with shouts of "YOLO!" or some snide remarks.
Gah.
I'll get over it.
For now - I'm making lesson plans and moving on. Let's just write it off as a bad day for them AND for me and start new on Monday.
Yeah. Let's do that.
7th - Finished the outsiders - my students are brilliant readers.
8th - Finished the outline of our argumentative essays in response to Downriver. My students are so sharp.
But 4th period - AGAIN - I just couldn't get a handle on today. My 2nd period 8th grade class did GREAT. They finished their outlines without too much of a problem and we went right into our discussion of the purpose of counterarguments. We even had a "Backwards Debate" where we picked topics they thought I would disagree with them on, and then they had to brainstorm what evidence they thought I would use in a debate. Essentially, they were arguing MY side. It was a hoot! So much fun.
But 4th period - AGAIN - it didn't work for them. I've got some smart students who are "with it" who were already done with their outline so they wanted to sleep (even though I had planned differentiated activities and told those students to start pulling direct quotes from the novel to support the evidence they outlined). I've got some lazy students who hardly had anything filled in from our class time yesterday and when I tried to help them, they were all like, "I've got it, I've got it..." but then didn't do the work and decided to goof off on the iPad. I've got students who decided to write stupid things on their outline that they knew weren't true. And I've got students who are just dying to get to the next stage and are frustrated at how slow I'm moving - but that's only because so many students are so far behind.
(This has really got me thinking about the ethics behind honors classes now. I heard some teachers debate, earlier this year, about honors classes - some of them arguing that honors classes are elitist and rob our other classes of differentiated comments and ideas. And I understood where they were coming from - almost agreed - but now, I understand that it's a level-of-understanding thing. I'm dying for my brilliant students to move on because I would be right there with them, biting at the bit to move MY pace. But I have a bunch of students who don't care or who won't work unless I'm standing right behind them that keep us moving slower than I would ever want.)
And then I've got students in that class that do everything possible to make it THEIR class. I thought the "debate Mrs. Brown" thing would be great, but they just turned disrespectful and unreasonable. I actually had a student (who was very passionate about the topic, mind you) refuse to participate when I asked him to (because he was making off-hand remarks to what I was saying every two seconds). He stated, "Why should I say anything now? You're just going to say something stupid." Thank you student for supplying me with perfect evidence about the need to give credit to your opponents argument before moving on with your own, otherwise they don't respect YOUR opinion. Yeah - he didn't appreciate me using him as an example.
It was just bad.
Even the cute girl student who confessed to me yesterday that I was her favorite teacher in the school and that she wanted me to teach 9th grade next year left the class with just a "Bye, Mrs. Brown" and an unsatisfied look on her face.
Will I ever get it right?
Yes. It's Friday and my students have all been pretty tired. Yes. They're eighth graders and maybe this is their signal to me that they already know this stuff and I should just move on. Yes, I'm exasperated because every time I think I'm making headway on reading the needs of these students, they throw a curve ball at me.
I have no idea what to do from here. I really want to go pull some of those disrespectful students from out of their 5th period class and have them sign a behavior contract that lays some ground rules that they agree to follow because I can't have 4-5 male students always trying to one-up me and my lessons with shouts of "YOLO!" or some snide remarks.
Gah.
I'll get over it.
For now - I'm making lesson plans and moving on. Let's just write it off as a bad day for them AND for me and start new on Monday.
Yeah. Let's do that.
Wednesday, February 6, 2013
Two Birds. One Stone.
Today - was good. I'm realizing, with my 7th graders, that it's okay to have a reading day. It's okay for the daily objective to be that students finish Chapter 9. Do I always have analytical questions and discussions during the reading? Yes. Do I always ask comprehension questions along the way? Yes. But I HAVE to be okay with a Reading day - otherwise it would take us another 3 weeks to finish this book. Do I still feel somewhat guilty for having an entire day be just reading... yes. But my students have let me know that they find it difficult to do multiple tasks at once (filling out a comprehension worksheet while reading, taking notes while reading, etc.) and I'm tired of them devoting 50% of their attention to the novel and 50% to their notes. Neither task is ever fully and successfully accomplished. So, I'm adapting, and I'm swallowing my guilt. For now. We WILL finish this novel by the end of the week. We WILL!
My 8th graders? Today was our practice argumentative essay day. Yesterday we reviewed important terms for argumentative writing (as well as for essay writing) and we talked about organization, so today, I wanted a pre-assessment to see where my students are already at.
I had a prompt picked out, nothing miraculous, but I'd started the prep work. But then my husband begged me for help. He's in a class devoted to innovation and his group has proposed this new product or company. The purpose of the company is to create personal logos for their clients that help to describe who they are at a glance. It's almost like a "break the ice" kind of opportunity. You see the colors/shape of someone's logo and you can say to yourself, "Hey - they like sports. I like sports. We have something in common. I could go talk to this person..." They wanted feedback from different ages of students - middle school, high school, and college: places where it's important to make friends fast and have a way to break the ice.
So my dear hubby wrote my students a letter asking for their help. In the letter he explained the purpose of the company, the product, and gave them a prompt asking them if they would be willing to spend money to buy a key chain with their logo on it. Why or why not?
I was surprised by what some of my 8th graders were able to come up with. And they were almost EXCITED at the idea that this was a real product that someone was thinking about and they were providing REAL feedback that would be used! It was one of those moments when you realize how essential the PUBLISHING aspect of the writing process is and how important AUTHENTICITY is to writing assignments.
Either way - productive day.
Internal Reflection: I feel like when state tests loom in the distance, my to-do list just gets longer and longer and I'm getting less and less done. I know I'm not alone - I mean, one glance at nearly any member of our school's teaching staff and you know . . . We are pooped.
(not like yesterday's pooped, mind you. ;)
But as the DWA approaches, I'm becoming hyperaware of each one of the skills I need to teach and review with my students and there's simply not enough time. And I'm getting frustrated easily when my students - who KNOW the difference between their, there, and they're because we've reviewed it like 10+ times in my class - don't show me what they know in their work. Do they know they need a period there? Yes. At least they do when I ask, "What is this sentence missing?" Do they know which "their/there/they're" to use in their writing? Yes. At least they do when I test them on it. But I can't get it to transfer to their writing - granted today was a first draft at best and it was practice... But that DWA test scares the daylights out of me.
My current to-do list:
-grade 7th grade journal entries
-analyze 8th graders' practice essays to determine lesson emphases for the next 2 weeks
-submit sub requests
-revise resume
-submit applications on teachers-teachers and on Alpine School District
- complete lesson plans for this week
-finalize next week's lessons
-create sub plan for next week
-email practicum student about lesson for next week
-research state tests from states that post older state tests online. Start creating test prep material for March.
-finish uploading student names to utahwrites (since I have to create their account individually. Ouch.)
-update my class calendars and folders on edmodo
-collect/retrieve letters of recommendation
-create resume portfolio for job fairs
-pick up husband and drive him to the train station by 4:30
-clean apartment for the arrival of my dear family this weekend
-stay sane.
How am I going to accomplish all these things? No idea.
Is it hard to stay focused about my work here at Dixon when I keep thinking, "I may not even be here next year and I need to start researching for a new job next year..." Yes. And No. But it is really tough to start worrying about yourself when all you've been worrying about for the last few months is your students...
How do I do it all?
Pray.
And put my family to work this weekend. :) Good idea, no?
My 8th graders? Today was our practice argumentative essay day. Yesterday we reviewed important terms for argumentative writing (as well as for essay writing) and we talked about organization, so today, I wanted a pre-assessment to see where my students are already at.
I had a prompt picked out, nothing miraculous, but I'd started the prep work. But then my husband begged me for help. He's in a class devoted to innovation and his group has proposed this new product or company. The purpose of the company is to create personal logos for their clients that help to describe who they are at a glance. It's almost like a "break the ice" kind of opportunity. You see the colors/shape of someone's logo and you can say to yourself, "Hey - they like sports. I like sports. We have something in common. I could go talk to this person..." They wanted feedback from different ages of students - middle school, high school, and college: places where it's important to make friends fast and have a way to break the ice.
So my dear hubby wrote my students a letter asking for their help. In the letter he explained the purpose of the company, the product, and gave them a prompt asking them if they would be willing to spend money to buy a key chain with their logo on it. Why or why not?
I was surprised by what some of my 8th graders were able to come up with. And they were almost EXCITED at the idea that this was a real product that someone was thinking about and they were providing REAL feedback that would be used! It was one of those moments when you realize how essential the PUBLISHING aspect of the writing process is and how important AUTHENTICITY is to writing assignments.
Either way - productive day.
Internal Reflection: I feel like when state tests loom in the distance, my to-do list just gets longer and longer and I'm getting less and less done. I know I'm not alone - I mean, one glance at nearly any member of our school's teaching staff and you know . . . We are pooped.
(not like yesterday's pooped, mind you. ;)
But as the DWA approaches, I'm becoming hyperaware of each one of the skills I need to teach and review with my students and there's simply not enough time. And I'm getting frustrated easily when my students - who KNOW the difference between their, there, and they're because we've reviewed it like 10+ times in my class - don't show me what they know in their work. Do they know they need a period there? Yes. At least they do when I ask, "What is this sentence missing?" Do they know which "their/there/they're" to use in their writing? Yes. At least they do when I test them on it. But I can't get it to transfer to their writing - granted today was a first draft at best and it was practice... But that DWA test scares the daylights out of me.
My current to-do list:
-grade 7th grade journal entries
-analyze 8th graders' practice essays to determine lesson emphases for the next 2 weeks
-submit sub requests
-revise resume
-submit applications on teachers-teachers and on Alpine School District
- complete lesson plans for this week
-finalize next week's lessons
-create sub plan for next week
-email practicum student about lesson for next week
-research state tests from states that post older state tests online. Start creating test prep material for March.
-finish uploading student names to utahwrites (since I have to create their account individually. Ouch.)
-update my class calendars and folders on edmodo
-collect/retrieve letters of recommendation
-create resume portfolio for job fairs
-pick up husband and drive him to the train station by 4:30
-clean apartment for the arrival of my dear family this weekend
-stay sane.
How am I going to accomplish all these things? No idea.
Is it hard to stay focused about my work here at Dixon when I keep thinking, "I may not even be here next year and I need to start researching for a new job next year..." Yes. And No. But it is really tough to start worrying about yourself when all you've been worrying about for the last few months is your students...
How do I do it all?
Pray.
And put my family to work this weekend. :) Good idea, no?
Tuesday, February 5, 2013
The Unspeakable...
So....
I have a student with a health problem.
A pretty serious one.
It's called encopresis.
Not exactly the greatest health problem to have in middle school, mind you.
So today, the bell rings and I am gearing myself up for the start of 1st period when in walks this particular student.
I don't notice anything out of the ordinary. I'm just greeting students coming through the door.
Sidenote - remember that Practicum student who didn't show last week? Yeah. She's here today. Just for this.... ;)
As I re-enter the classroom, it's evident something's awry.
One of my more outspoken students - who am I kidding, the kid has NO idea what tact is - points out to me that there is "Dog poop." On the floor.
And yes, my friends, there was real-live feces on the floor of my classroom, but I knew instantaneously that it did not come from an invisible dog roaming the halls of the school.
I look up to find the student (I am the only one in the room who knows about his condition) and he's not in the classroom. I'm thinking, "Good - he went to go take a shower," since the school counselors have talked to him about this procedure, "and I don't have to say a word."
Meanwhile, I have human feces on my floor with a classroom full of students making "EWWWWW" faces at me.
I'm sorry - was this in the training manual?
I immediately get the class working on the journal prompt and go to the phone to call the custodian who doesn't answer. So, I call the front desk. "Hi, this is Mrs. Brown. Can you page [the custodian]? I've got feces on the floor of my classroom . . . Yes, I'm in room 218. . . Okay, thanks."
And I'm freaking out because I don't want my students making a fuss about it and I don't want this particular student to feel singled out and I don't want poop on my floor!
But that's an internal freakout. When this student re-enters the room to go sit down, it's apparent (to my nose) that he did not procede immediately to the showers. In the most discreet way I could, I asked the student to step outside. "Did you have an accident?" I asked him quietly.
"No," he responds.
Of course, Cali! Why would he actually tell you the truth, here! This is embarrassing and you're his teacher. A GIRL teacher at that. Why would he actually admit to you that he soiled his pants?
"Oh okay - that's fine. Hey, Mr. (name-of-counselor) called while you were gone. He wanted to see you this morning. Why don't you head down there now?"
"Uh - okay..." he stammers as he leaves.
In one motion, I re-enter the classroom and call the counselor to let him know to "be expecting a student who's in need of school services." Good thing I've talked to this counselor before because he knew just what I meant.
Did I handle it perfectly? No. When the student re-entered the classroom, several students physically moved away from him (despite our assigned seating) because of the smell. Did I talk to them about it privately? Yes, but I reminded them to stay on task and focus on the work and I would take care of the smell.
GAH. My heart just hurts for this student... What could I have done more? How could I have made everything less obvious?
When the custodian came into the room to clean it up he asked, "Is there anywhere else that needs cleaning?" For precautions sake, I pointed to this students' desk (he had already left) and the custodian wiped it down with bleach solution. DIDN'T I JUST MAKE EVERYTHING OBVIOUS? But wasn't that also the best and most responsible thing to do?
Gah.
This practicum student is sitting here watching me fumble through everything for 1st period and I'm just pleading to myself, "Please don't let her think I'm a horrible teacher..." Why? Because I thought the intern I was assigned to for my practicum was a bum. Was he? No, but he was so negative about the profession and about his experience and I thought I could do better.
Oh heavens... I probably deserved today. Prideful baby teacher. I think I've learned my lesson.
I have a student with a health problem.
A pretty serious one.
It's called encopresis.
Not exactly the greatest health problem to have in middle school, mind you.
So today, the bell rings and I am gearing myself up for the start of 1st period when in walks this particular student.
I don't notice anything out of the ordinary. I'm just greeting students coming through the door.
Sidenote - remember that Practicum student who didn't show last week? Yeah. She's here today. Just for this.... ;)
As I re-enter the classroom, it's evident something's awry.
One of my more outspoken students - who am I kidding, the kid has NO idea what tact is - points out to me that there is "Dog poop." On the floor.
And yes, my friends, there was real-live feces on the floor of my classroom, but I knew instantaneously that it did not come from an invisible dog roaming the halls of the school.
I look up to find the student (I am the only one in the room who knows about his condition) and he's not in the classroom. I'm thinking, "Good - he went to go take a shower," since the school counselors have talked to him about this procedure, "and I don't have to say a word."
Meanwhile, I have human feces on my floor with a classroom full of students making "EWWWWW" faces at me.
I'm sorry - was this in the training manual?
I immediately get the class working on the journal prompt and go to the phone to call the custodian who doesn't answer. So, I call the front desk. "Hi, this is Mrs. Brown. Can you page [the custodian]? I've got feces on the floor of my classroom . . . Yes, I'm in room 218. . . Okay, thanks."
And I'm freaking out because I don't want my students making a fuss about it and I don't want this particular student to feel singled out and I don't want poop on my floor!
But that's an internal freakout. When this student re-enters the room to go sit down, it's apparent (to my nose) that he did not procede immediately to the showers. In the most discreet way I could, I asked the student to step outside. "Did you have an accident?" I asked him quietly.
"No," he responds.
Of course, Cali! Why would he actually tell you the truth, here! This is embarrassing and you're his teacher. A GIRL teacher at that. Why would he actually admit to you that he soiled his pants?
"Oh okay - that's fine. Hey, Mr. (name-of-counselor) called while you were gone. He wanted to see you this morning. Why don't you head down there now?"
"Uh - okay..." he stammers as he leaves.
In one motion, I re-enter the classroom and call the counselor to let him know to "be expecting a student who's in need of school services." Good thing I've talked to this counselor before because he knew just what I meant.
Did I handle it perfectly? No. When the student re-entered the classroom, several students physically moved away from him (despite our assigned seating) because of the smell. Did I talk to them about it privately? Yes, but I reminded them to stay on task and focus on the work and I would take care of the smell.
GAH. My heart just hurts for this student... What could I have done more? How could I have made everything less obvious?
When the custodian came into the room to clean it up he asked, "Is there anywhere else that needs cleaning?" For precautions sake, I pointed to this students' desk (he had already left) and the custodian wiped it down with bleach solution. DIDN'T I JUST MAKE EVERYTHING OBVIOUS? But wasn't that also the best and most responsible thing to do?
Gah.
This practicum student is sitting here watching me fumble through everything for 1st period and I'm just pleading to myself, "Please don't let her think I'm a horrible teacher..." Why? Because I thought the intern I was assigned to for my practicum was a bum. Was he? No, but he was so negative about the profession and about his experience and I thought I could do better.
Oh heavens... I probably deserved today. Prideful baby teacher. I think I've learned my lesson.
Monday, February 4, 2013
Sometimes...
Sometimes you make a lesson almost absolutely about independent learning and independent practice for your students just because...
...you're sick....
...and you wouldn't survive without it.
Yeah.
That's today.
Funny thing - the students are like that, too. Most of them sick or were sick over the weekend so they didn't get anything done.
Oh well...
I can't sympathize with them at all - I mean, I only had two sticky noted to-do lists set aside for this weekend and didn't cross a single thing off.
No biggie.
Today must end quickly.
Like now.
...you're sick....
...and you wouldn't survive without it.
Yeah.
That's today.
Funny thing - the students are like that, too. Most of them sick or were sick over the weekend so they didn't get anything done.
Oh well...
I can't sympathize with them at all - I mean, I only had two sticky noted to-do lists set aside for this weekend and didn't cross a single thing off.
No biggie.
Today must end quickly.
Like now.
Friday, February 1, 2013
Whoa...
So I went home immediately after school yesterday. Not even kidding. The kids left my room to head on to the busses and I was pulling out in my car before the busses even left.
I think the principal saw it, too. Oops.
But what can I say? It was a goal of mine to never throw up in front of my students - ever. And I wasn't about to ruin that goal yesterday.
I got home and barely had time to change into sweats before I crashed on the couch and broke out in pure sweat. Yup. The fever. And it hit hard. I was asleep (with only the slight wakings when I was burning up but refused to take off the blankets cause I knew the chills would shortly follow) from 3:30pm to 7:45pm when my smart-because-he-decided-to-stay-at-school-while-his-wife-was-flippin-miserable-and-contagious husband finally walked through the door. I took some NyQuil around 8:30 and was out again until 6:00 this morning.
Wow, right?
Felt a lot better when I arose, though I'm now echoing the coughs of my students and my voice sounds like I've been a smoker for 20 years. Just sayin.
Speaking of sick, I have not had a single class today where less than 6 students were absent. That's right. In one period, I had TEN students - yes 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10! - absent. Most of them from sickness.
What do you do here? I've felt chastised by the facebook posts of a few local mommies who pleaded, "If you're sick, STAY HOME! Stop spreading it to our healthy kids! You're not doing anyone a favor by bringing your baby with croup to church!" Granted I'm not letting my sick kids go to school sick. I'm going to school sick. But I'm taking precautions - staying away from students, not touching anything, wiping down things I may have touched, etc.
And let's face it. The only reason I'm doing it is the fact I don't trust subs. I've had little experience with them yes, but when you get a note that says, "We didn't have time to get to your lesson, sorry," from a sub, you lose all confidence. Just sayin. It's more work to try to prep for a sub that DOESN'T know your students like you do. You'd almost rather go to work sick.
But guess who's putting in sub requests as we speak? Me. I was asked by the school librarian to attend a Librarian's conference with her in March. Woot! So that's one day (funded by the school, so even better). Also, requesting a sub for the teacher fair in March as well. Then, I'M GRADUATING! Yup. It's happening. Just so happens that CRTs (end of level tests) are happening the same week, so I'm holding on that sub request until I know for sure that my absence won't fall on an English testing day.
Did one of the other teachers advise me to skip my own graduation? Yeah. Have I already thought about it? Yeah. But how many opportunities am I going to have to celebrate my hard work as a student? 5 years of hard work!? I think I'm going to go for it - plus I have the feeling that navy blue cap-and-gown will suit me just perfectly.
But today is going really well - I love that my students still love to read. Whoa... I wonder when some people lost that and how I can prevent it...
Happy Weekend!
I think the principal saw it, too. Oops.
But what can I say? It was a goal of mine to never throw up in front of my students - ever. And I wasn't about to ruin that goal yesterday.
I got home and barely had time to change into sweats before I crashed on the couch and broke out in pure sweat. Yup. The fever. And it hit hard. I was asleep (with only the slight wakings when I was burning up but refused to take off the blankets cause I knew the chills would shortly follow) from 3:30pm to 7:45pm when my smart-because-he-decided-to-stay-at-school-while-his-wife-was-flippin-miserable-and-contagious husband finally walked through the door. I took some NyQuil around 8:30 and was out again until 6:00 this morning.
Wow, right?
Felt a lot better when I arose, though I'm now echoing the coughs of my students and my voice sounds like I've been a smoker for 20 years. Just sayin.
Speaking of sick, I have not had a single class today where less than 6 students were absent. That's right. In one period, I had TEN students - yes 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10! - absent. Most of them from sickness.
What do you do here? I've felt chastised by the facebook posts of a few local mommies who pleaded, "If you're sick, STAY HOME! Stop spreading it to our healthy kids! You're not doing anyone a favor by bringing your baby with croup to church!" Granted I'm not letting my sick kids go to school sick. I'm going to school sick. But I'm taking precautions - staying away from students, not touching anything, wiping down things I may have touched, etc.
And let's face it. The only reason I'm doing it is the fact I don't trust subs. I've had little experience with them yes, but when you get a note that says, "We didn't have time to get to your lesson, sorry," from a sub, you lose all confidence. Just sayin. It's more work to try to prep for a sub that DOESN'T know your students like you do. You'd almost rather go to work sick.
But guess who's putting in sub requests as we speak? Me. I was asked by the school librarian to attend a Librarian's conference with her in March. Woot! So that's one day (funded by the school, so even better). Also, requesting a sub for the teacher fair in March as well. Then, I'M GRADUATING! Yup. It's happening. Just so happens that CRTs (end of level tests) are happening the same week, so I'm holding on that sub request until I know for sure that my absence won't fall on an English testing day.
Did one of the other teachers advise me to skip my own graduation? Yeah. Have I already thought about it? Yeah. But how many opportunities am I going to have to celebrate my hard work as a student? 5 years of hard work!? I think I'm going to go for it - plus I have the feeling that navy blue cap-and-gown will suit me just perfectly.
But today is going really well - I love that my students still love to read. Whoa... I wonder when some people lost that and how I can prevent it...
Happy Weekend!
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